Well, I tell ya, this whole star business is a bit of a hogwash, but the young folks seem to like it, so let’s yak about it. They call it the zodiac, or somethin’ like that. Sounds fancy, but it’s just a bunch of pictures they made up in the sky, like lookin’ at clouds and seein’ rabbits.
Now, they say these stars and signs can tell ya about yer day, yer love life, and even yer lucky numbers. I ain’t never seen a star pick a winning lottery ticket, but hey, to each their own, I always say. They got these signs, like Aries, Taurus, and that Gemini fella, always two-faced, if ya ask me.
- Aries, they say, is like a ram, always head-buttin’ stuff.
- Taurus, that’s the bull, stubborn as a mule.
- Then there’s Gemini, the twins, flippin’ and floppin’ like a fish outta water.
And it goes on and on, Cancer the crab, always crabbin’ about somethin’, Leo the lion, thinkin’ he’s the king of the jungle, and so on. Virgo, Libra, Scorpio, Sagittarius, Capricorn, Aquarius, and Pisces. A whole zoo up there in the sky.
But here’s the kicker, them city slickers, the ones they call NASA, they say the signs ain’t even right no more. Seems like the Earth wobbled a bit, or somethin’, and now there’s a new fella in town, Ophiuchus, or somethin’ like that. Sounds like a sneeze, if you ask me.
They say he falls between November 29 and December 17. So if you thought you was a Sagittarius, you might just be this O-fee-yoo-kus fella now. And there’s another one, Cetus, though they don’t talk much about him. Messing with things that don’t need messin’, if ya ask me.
Now, this new calendar, or whatever they call it, it changes things up a bit. They say the new astrological year starts on March 19 this year. That’s when the sun goes into somethin’ called Aries, the first fella in line. And this year the moon is in Leo, which, I reckon, means nothin’ at all, but the youngsters like to hear about it.
They talk about waxing moons and full moons, and new moons, like the moon’s got nothin’ better to do than change shapes all the time. I tell ya, when I was young, the moon was just the moon. It shined at night, and that was that. But now, it’s got all sorts of meanings and influences, or so they say. Makes my head spin, it does.
This whole thing started with some folks a long, long time ago, lookin’ up at the sky and makin’ up stories. And now, here we are, still talkin’ about it. September 26, 2016, someone said the signs have shifted. Well, I reckon the sky ain’t moved, it’s them folks down here who keep changin’ their minds.
They got these dates and times for everything. Like, March 1, the sun is in somethin’ called Pisces, and Jupiter is in Taurus. And they say, “get ready to say white rabbit.” I ain’t got a clue what that means, but I bet it sounds important to someone. They even got dates and times for the new moons and full moons. Like keepin’ track of a hen layin’ eggs, only it’s the moon this time.
So, there ya have it. The new zodiac calendar, or whatever they’re callin’ it these days. It’s a whole lot of fuss about stars and signs and dates, but if it makes folks happy, well, I ain’t gonna argue. Just don’t ask me to pick my lottery numbers based on it. I’d rather stick to my gut and a lucky penny. That’s always worked better for me.
2024 is gonna be a year just like any other year, with sun and rain, and work to be done. And whether you’re an Aries or an O-fee-yoo-kus, you still gotta get up in the mornin’ and face the day. That’s the only truth I know about stars and signs, or anything else for that matter.
So don’t get yer knickers in a twist about this new zodiac business. It’s just somethin’ to talk about when the weather’s bad and there’s nothin’ good on TV. Just remember, the stars are up there, and we’re down here, and that’s the way it’s always been, and the way it always will be. That’s my two cents, anyway. Now, where’s my tea…
Tags: [zodiac, astrology, new calendar, NASA, signs, dates, Ophiuchus, Cetus, moon, stars]
