Okay, so today I wanted to talk about something called “Bert Hellinger Family Constellation.” I bumped into this when I was going through some rough patches with my family and wanted to see if there was anything out there that could help. I gotta say, the whole process was quite a journey, and I kept a pretty detailed record of it.
First off, I spent a whole weekend just digging into what family constellation is. I found a lot of information on some forums and old websites. Apparently, it’s this method a guy named Bert Hellinger developed, used in psychotherapy. This Bert Hellinger guy spent time in South Africa, which I thought was a cool bit of trivia.
After I felt like I had a decent grasp on the concept, I started to look for the PDF document named “Bert Hellinger Family Constellation”. I found there are many documents about it, then I began to read and selected the one I thought was best.
Then came the time to actually try this out. I found a local therapist who does this kind of work. It took me a while to work up the courage, but I finally booked a session. The therapist was this really calm and steady person, which helped a lot. The session itself was intense. We started with me describing my family issues, the history, the dynamics, you name it. The therapist listened, asked a few questions, and then we got into the constellation part.
The therapist had me choose objects to represent each family member, including myself. I remember picking up each object, thinking hard about who they represented, and placing them in relation to each other in the room. It sounds simple, but man, it felt heavy. Then the therapist had me move the objects around based on my feelings and insights. Some moves felt right, others didn’t, and we talked through each of those moments. I moved the objects a few times, trying to find a setup that felt “right” or at least “better.”
I wrote down everything after each session – how I felt, what came up during the constellation, any changes I noticed in my family interactions afterward. It was a lot of writing, a lot of thinking. Some days I felt like I was making breakthroughs, other days I felt more confused than ever. But I kept at it.
- Session 1: Initial setup, felt overwhelmed.
- Session 2: Moved my “dad” further away, felt a sense of relief.
- Session 3: Brought my “sister” closer, started to see her perspective a bit more.
- Session 4: Realized I was carrying a lot of my “mom’s” burdens, worked on setting boundaries.
After a few months, I started to see real changes. Not just in how I felt, but in how my family was interacting. We were communicating better, there was less tension, and I felt like I had a better handle on my own emotions. It wasn’t a magic fix, but it definitely helped me understand and navigate my family dynamics better.
Looking back at my notes, it’s a bit of a messy journey, but it was worth it. I learned a lot about myself, my family, and how our past impacts our present. I still have the “Bert Hellinger Family Constellation” PDF on my computer, and sometimes I go back to it to remind myself of the process and the insights I gained. It’s a reminder of the work I’ve done and how far I’ve come.
So, yeah, that’s my experience with Bert Hellinger’s Family Constellation. It’s not for everyone, but for me, it was a powerful tool for change. If you’re going through something similar, it might be worth looking into. Just remember to take it slow, be patient with yourself, and keep track of your progress. You might be surprised at what you discover.
