Alright, alright, let’s talk about this here… uh… geek bar blue rancher constellation thingy. Sounds fancy, don’t it? Like somethin’ them city folks would jabber about.
First off, what is it? Near as I can tell, it’s one of them vapes. You know, them things that puff out smoke? Kids these days, always fiddlin’ with somethin’. Back in my day, we smoked corn silk if we wanted somethin’ to puff on.

This particular one, they call it “Blue Rancher.” Now, that brings back memories. Used to have these blue raspberry candies, hard as a rock, but oh so sweet. This vape thingy, it’s supposed to taste just like that. Imagine that! Tastes like candy, but it ain’t. Kids today, they got it all backwards.
- They say it’s got blueberry and blue razz flavor. I ain’t never heard of no “razz” before, but if it tastes like them blue candies, I reckon it’s alright.
- They also say it’s “balanced.” Balanced what? My checkbook? Ha! Probably means it ain’t too sweet, not too sour. Just right, like Goldilocks and her porridge.
- And get this, it’s got some kinda picture on it. A… a “constellation.” Sounds like somethin’ outta them sci-fi movies my grandson watches. They say it’s the “Pisces Constellation.” Fish, I think. Like the ones we used to catch down by the creek.
Now, they call it a “Pulse X 25000.” Sounds like a spaceship! But it just means it’s got a lot of puffs in it, I guess. 25000 puffs! That’s a whole lotta puffin’. Back in my day, a pack of cigarettes lasted a week, and that was plenty. These young’uns, they go through these things like water.
They also talk about “intense flavor.” Bold and juicy, they say. Made with real fruit juice, even! Well, I reckon that’s better than whatever chemicals they used to put in them things. If it tastes like real fruit, maybe it ain’t so bad. But still, puffin’ on somethin’ all day long… Seems a bit much to me.
They compare it to other flavors too, like “Grape Blow Pop” and “Lemon Heads.” More candy flavors! It’s like they’re tryin’ to turn everyone into little kids again. Don’t they know there’s more to life than sweets? Gotta eat your vegetables, too!
This whole thing, this “Geek Bar Blue Rancher Constellation,” it’s just a fancy way of sayin’ “flavored smoke.” They dress it up with all these big words and pictures, but in the end, it’s just somethin’ to puff on. And I still don’t quite get it. Why would you wanna suck on somethin’ that tastes like candy all day long? But hey, to each their own, I guess. I’ll stick to my iced tea and sunshine. That’s plenty of flavor for me.
Anyways, that’s my two cents on this here “geek bar blue rancher constellation.” If you like candy and puffin’, I guess it’s for you. But if you ask me, it’s just another one of them newfangled gadgets that young folks are so crazy about.

And one more thing, don’t go spendin’ all your money on this stuff. Save some for a rainy day, ya hear? That’s what my mama always used to say. And she was a smart woman, even if she never heard of no “blue razz.”
Tags: [Geek Bar, Blue Rancher, Vape, Disposable Vape, E-cigarette, Pisces Constellation, Blue Raspberry, Candy Flavor, Puff Bar]